James Seminara, Kraft Macaroni & Cheese Addict

As I write this, my two-year-old son James is fast asleep in his crib, with boxes of Kraft Macaroni & Cheese in his hands and around his little body. Like many products geared towards kids, it’s not so much that he loves the taste of mac and cheese, which he does. It’s about the marketing.

The boxes have images of the Cars movie, Madagascar 3, Phineas and Ferband a variety of other movies and shows he’s interested in. If you have kids, you already know that the creation of a film geared towards children is now just a pretext to sell you a shitload of trademarked junk made in China. The $15 DVD you buy is simply the entrée into a world of associated products your kid will want after seeing the movie.

But it’s hard to find fault with Kraft Mac and Cheese at 99 cents a box or less. Still, James’ obsession is a bit unsettling to say the least. He likes to carry the boxes with him all around the house, into bed, on the potty, in the car, to school, everywhere. And not just 1-2 boxes, but as many as he can possibly juggle. He’s often tripping over the damn things he leaves around the house.

The boxes we have in the house at the moment are more banged up than an ’85 Yugo because he insists on sleeping with them and they inevitably get dented. We’re preparing for a long overseas trip and my wife bought about a dozen boxes with the thought that she’d just take the flavor packets out and pack them. It’s easy to find the macaroni anywhere, but harder to get the cheese just right.

We’ve tried to give him Trader Joe’s mac and cheese but he’s not into it. I suspect that when we try to give him the mac and cheese sans boxes in Europe, he’ll lose interest in it. No, there is nothing quite like a box of Kraft Macaroni & Cheese. Especially the boxes.